Wonderful Days Off

Waking up late and gradually starting my day with a hot, creme brulee flavored coffee. Staying in my pjs until I've finished with breakfast. Reading the newspaper and seeing the ads, instead of working on them. These are just a few reasons I thrive on just having one or two random days off.

I am about to go to the park with my puppy, snacks, blankets, and a good book to just read under the trees. I feel such freedom, and I feel a little like I'm playing hooky that just heightens everything I couldn't normally do on a Thursday afternoon. Later I will pack up and run with Chloe in an attempt to thaw my undoubtedly frozen behind. I will stay up late tonight watching scary movies knowing that I don't have to work tomorrow either. And finally tomorrow I will prepare my house for my annual Halloween party, which is by far one of my favorite holidays. Even getting diabetes could not spoil my love affair with endless candy (and Saturday ON SALE candy) and cheesy scary movies.

Days like this, I now notice, also throw a slight wrench in my diabetes management. Waking up slow and late, while so indulgent, seem to cause terribly high blood sugars that also start off my day. This morning I was a very unhealthy 308, and I had to wait a bit for my insulin to kick in before my coffee and raisin toast. While I usually take my basal in the very early(5am) morning, this 6 hour delay will no doubt keep my blood sugars off track the rest of the day. It is however a small price to pay for my mini vacation, because after all I think every diabetic needs a break from rigid management.

For now I'm off to enjoy this beautiful weather and a glorious day away from responsibility!

One eye open

I am writing this post with just one eye open, in an amazingly dark room. Why?

...because I have apparently developed a very bad habit of sleeping with my eyes partially open. At least that is what my ophthalmologist told me today, after she gracefully worked me into an emergency appointment.

You see, I woke up at 3AM this morning with severe pain in my left eye. It felt like someone had planted glass under my eyelids. Upon waking, my eye would not even be forced open, and was just as watery and painful closed. Light had become my enemy, and with the waterworks also came the runny nose. I swear, I'll never understand how the nose and eyes are connected that way.

Forget about work. I sat in a dark room with a cold pack on my eye, waiting until the doctors office opened. For a while, I considered rushing to the Eye Foundation Hospital's emergency room, but convinced myself to suck it up and wait for the doctor's office to open. My next dilemma, which doctor to see? I haven't seen anything but an optometrist for years. In an effort to be seen today, I called the last eye doctor I remember.

The receptionist answered the call, and I told her my problem and included the fact that I had seen her (the eye doctor) before. It helped! She squeezed me in at 10:30, and I patiently waited until it was time to leave. Of course, I have to drive in terrible rainy weather with only one contact, while in pain, totally light phobic and squinting. I am very blessed I got there in one piece, but not without getting lost. Her office had moved...oops. So I got there a little late, and apologized to the receptionist.
"I thought you said you had seen her before," she said very disgruntled. " I have, but it was a long time ago," I replied. She then said she would check the archives. AND THEY FOUND ME! They had my records back from 1996. I am still impressed. The doctor even remembered me.

So back to my eye. I have a corneal ulcer that is horizontal and placed directly across the center of my eye. How did this happen? Well, the eye doc has seen this before, and thinks I sleep with my eyes partially open. This leaves my eyes extremely dry, and predisposes my eyelid to stick to my eye. When I opened my eye, my eyelid, literally peeled back the top layer of my cornea. OUCH! She continued on to say that it is more common in diabetics, and that it would take longer to heal as well. joy.

For now I'm covered in all kinds of drops and oily ointments, but nothing for pain. I'm also in glasses for at least a month, which means I have to buy new ones. Mine were stepped on and cracked about a month ago. I'll just have to get a very stylish pair of frames, and call it a new look.

On the pump front, I ordered my pump yesterday with mixed emotions. Pure excitement over the pump, but a little depression over my test results. My endo sent me a letter Wednesday with the instructions to order the pump and included my c-peptide and A1C. A1c was good, but my C-peptide was unmeasurable with a fasting BG of 176. 6 months ago, I had a positive c-peptide. I guess I still have lingering feelings that I am not "insulin dependent". Tests now show otherwise. I guess, I knew it was inevitable. Now, I have to wait on insurance approval and waiting is not my strong suit, but at least it's Friday. I have all weekend for my eye to recover without worrying about work. For that I am grateful.

Loooong time - No blog

I woke up late this morning (like 5 minutes before I was supposed to be at work)...
and realized that it was already October.

It's not the calendar that clues me in to this, but the season. It's harder to get up when the sun is still hiding from me as my alarm goes off. It's cooler, with a distinctive breeze that races through my apartment when my windows are open. It's the need to go on long walks in the early mornings or weekends just to be outside with all the beautiful reds and oranges as the leaves change. It is by far, my favorite time of year.

It's interesting to me that this year, it has quite literally snuck up on me. So many things have happened (and are happening) that I feel as if I'm being carried away by that strong October wind.

A quick recap.
1. My workplace has started trimming the fat with buyouts, and I have been on two job interviews in the last week. I'm not worried about my job, but the environment is getting tense!
2. My brother went missing for well over 2 months. I actually had to call the police in Spokane, to go by and check out his house. No help though. His car was gone and it just left us wondering. I found out two weeks ago that he's in China visiting a friend and attending a wedding. CHINA!!! You'd think if you were going to China for months, you would TELL SOMEONE!!! While I'm glad he's well, he might be in mortal danger the next time I see him!
3. I had a long talk with my doctor last week. Just when I'm ready to fire him, he changes. He was so cool, nice, funny and we actually communicated. Turns out, he didn't trust me to be on the pump. He was afraid I would manipulate my insulin, and would not take it seriously. He apparently thought the last time I had DKA, I was deliberately trying to lose weight. Foolish him. So now...

I AM GETTING A PUMP!!!!!

I am waiting to hear from him this week about my updated labs... and then we order the pump!!! He made a follow up for Dec. 2, and according to my nurse, that should be after I've been on the pump for a few weeks. That means I should be using the pump in less than a month. I'll probably be posting a lot during this time. I can't believe how excited I am about a medical device...Sad. Today, it would have saved me. In my attempt to rush to work, I forgot my basal shot. The extra trip home at lunch sucked.

For the record, I woke up at 6:55 am, and walked in the door to work at 7:10. Damn, I'm good!